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Women in Massage


Sunita Lama (name changed) from Handikhola, Makawanpur lost her mother since childhood. It was only her father who could have cared for her but instead because of his own selfishness he remarried and Sunita’s life became hard because of her step mother. Initially she accepted all the tortures but after being unable to bear her situation she left home and lived at her sister-in-law’s house.

It is said, “Where there is flaw there is a loss”. Sunita faced many trials in her life. Her guardian, sister-in-law was killed by Nepal Army accusing her as a Maoist messenger and because of this she became hopeless. She didn’t have any option as to what to do and where to go. She asked her friends for shelter and food and then came to Katmandu and ended at a massage center. Now she is not worried about food and shelter but worries about her life as her life is ruined. She says “Whatever customers ask we need to do and for some we need to give our whole body too”. If I leave this job, I don’t have any other profession. So I must stay here as I don’t have other alternatives.”

Another one is Anu Chhetry (name changed) from Sindhupolchowk. Her story is full of sorrow more than Sunita. Her father got second marriage while their family was running normally. After marriage; her father started to hate the children of his first wife. As being the eldest daughter, it became her responsibility to feed he r mother and brothers. Then she came to Kathmandu in search for work, but could not get descent job so she started working at a massage centre and started her massage parlor journey. Now she is desperate and worries about her future. She says “I have never thought parlor’s job will be like that. If I knew I would have never come in this field.”

Sunita was happy while she got the job the first time because she didn’t know what type of job it was. She didn’t know that such a hateful work was involved. She knew all these later. Sunita said, “Whatever customers say we must do otherwise they beat us. Some who don’t obey need to face torture also.” In the beginning she cried alone because she can’t bear these activities. Once she decided to leave the job also. But she accepted, thinking as her fate because she neither has home nor relatives. She said, “There were no alternatives for me because I could not do anything so I accepted that profession. I am living my life with grief.” This is the story of most of the girls who work at massage center. “It is our compulsion to do such work because we don’t have any other knowledge” said Anu who has entered this profession since she was eleven years old.

Most people don’t know what takes place inside massage parlors. But slowly it is coming out. It is heard now days that there sexual activities take place inside parlors so workers are worried about their life and profession. They are worrying about their future. Sunita said, “There should be massage only. They should not get any benefits by the innocence of village girls.” But who understands our grief? “What could happen now while there is democracy? There is no hope of living after returning to the village. Sitting here in the city, the government does not do anything for us,” Anu said in her sorrowful voice. “There is peace in the country but we don’t have that.”

Massage owners and customers torture us and sometimes the police even do the same. One lady worker at a massage center said “Police arrest us, accusing us for sexual activities and sometime they try to rape us themselves and if we don’t agree then they arrest us.” But police officer Mira Chaudhary denied this accusations and said “They only blamed us and they never reported about the wrong activities inside the parlors. They never came to register their case against the massage owners. If they have come then we can take action against the massage parlors.”

Sexual activities in massage centers are seen to be normal. Most customers of massage centers are male more than female. They go for massage but their actual intention is to get physical contact with female workers. One of the massage centre operator of Thamel openly said “The landlord charges more rent for massage centers and so to pay those rent we need to do such activities.” We will not do such activities if the government makes rules and regulations for us to operate massage centers.” She has realized that if government makes regulations then there will be no more wrong activities in massage centers and house rent will also be cheaper.
Massage centre workers only get one fourth of their salary and they never get in time; rest of the amount are taken by the owners. One worker said “They take their earnings so we could not pay our house rent on time.”

According to an NGO Researcher, Raksha Nepal, there are more than three hundred massage centers and five hundred women working. And most of them are between the ages of 12 to 25 years. Most of the centers are operated illegally and the government has not taken any action. According to the NGO, police sometimes follow up but they also work for money.

Raksha Nepal who has been working for massage center workers started vocational trainings for them. Menuka Thapa, President of that organization said, “We have trained 35 women so far. If we can organize all the massage centers, several women can get a job. This profession is not bad but there should be a good working environment.”

It is possible that HIV/ AIDS can infect the workers because of sexual activities inside massage centers. The workers are hated and they are even tortured by the society mentally and physically by the police. In this situation the government has a responsibility to organize these massage centers. If this happens then workers won’t be hated and can live with respectful lives in the society.

And the question is raised, is this not the time to think for the government to organize and manage massage centers?

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May 27, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Time Teaches us the Thing


One day when we went to the grocery store, I thought it would be a normal outing to buy food but it was different because I went with my mother. Arriving at the store, my mom went straight to the pickles aisle. She carefully read each bottle’s contents and took extra care handling them. I had no idea my mom loved pickles this much.

“Chora!, do you think you can go do the grocery shopping while I look at the pickles?” she asked.

“Uh, uh, I don’t-” I stuttered.

“Please, dear, I’ll be here forever if we don’t get something done.”

“Alright,” I said, reluctantly. I never did like grocery shopping, especially when I was the one doing it!

“Here’s the list. Have fun!” And just like that, she returned to looking at the contents of the pickle bottles.

Every night during dinner, my mom makes her way to the kitchen and takes out a bottle of pickle as delicately as handling a newborn baby. She gets a plate and puts some pickles on it. She then slowly moves toward the dining table, serves us equal amount of seasonal pickles and enjoys some herself.

One day while making tea, I noticed the date on one of the pickle bottles. I then ripped it out of the pantry and sprinted toward my mom.

“Mom mom!” I exclaimed. “This pickle is way past its expiration date.”

“Chora!, hold on,” she said.

“No, we can’t hav e this tonight!”

“Wait, let me tell you-”

“Would you like me to throw it away for you? Huh? Huh?” I asked.

“Ha, ha, no. Let me explain something,” my mom said jovially.

“But -” I didn’t want us all getting sick.

“Dear, wait a second,” she said more sternly. I guess the possibility of my throwing away her pickles had kicked in.

“Son, some wines and pickles like this dry lemon in oil get better over time. The longer you wait to have it, the better it will be. Although this may seem strange, it is true.”

When I was young, I didn’t have any understanding of what this meant but now, looking back, this would have been very helpful to remember as I went through adolescence.

In our society, we forget this simple rule: The longer you wait for certain things, the better they will be. But we want the best job as quickly as possible; we want to graduate from college in as few years as possible; we even speed through our homework just to chit-chat with friends. When we do this, we lose sight of the fundamentals.

We are all so intent on getting to the next step quickly that we will do anything to get there. This has a negative effect on our society. We become blood-thirsty zombies trying to get what we want. In a job situation, we want that promotion so much that we will step on others. When trying to go to the right college, we will do anything to get in and when we rush through our homework, we may not study enough for the test, and end up failing. All these common situations have one thing in common: they could all be solved if we just took our time.

When we don’t fully prepare ourselves for the next level, we become a society of people who aren’t ready, but want the rewards of reaching the next level. This cheats others who have prepared and deserve the job. We need to be ready for whatever comes, ready for the unexpected. Just as a lemon pickle gets better over time, so will the things in our paths.

May 27, 2009 Posted by | Life | Leave a comment

Teenage Pregnancy & Young Parents


Few days ago 17 year old girl from Lalitpur gave birth to a baby girl. Alisha (name changed) was a student of a reknowned 10+2 college in Kathmandu. She had been given sex education during her schooldays. She had been cautioned by her parents and the society about the cultural norms and values. But when her parents discovered that she was more than 18 weeks pregnant, it was too late to do anything.

Her family sold their house in Maharajgunj and moved to Satdobato where she gave birth to her girl child. Despite having knowledge about all the difficulties after becoming an unmarried parent- that too in her teens, she couldnt save herself or lets say couldnt refrain herself from early sex and early motherhood.

Nowdays she stays inside her room while her parents look after the newborn- all of them are equal unhappy about the circumtances which they should face in the future.

This is a recent example of the most common but ignored and untalked problem of the new generation of Nepal. There were several similar incidents in the past and in the future, the data is going to be more disturbing- thats for sure…

Is there any virgin belonging to generation Y? Well the time to ask this hasnt arrived yet but if it goes like this, such question is not far away even in Nepal. Looking to the suspect and victim of incidents of premarital sex , teen pregnancy and abortion, nobody is in the position to boast about his/her sexual life. Sex is a part of life. It is gift of God given to his people, but when they get out of control, the result of this is destruction. Sex should be done on the right time.

Premarital sex is the root of increasing number of single parents. That happens when babies are born to unwed parents. As of now, the most common fallacies is “good sex makes a good marriage so some partners justify living in or have premarital relationship to determine their sexual compatibility. But as we understand deeper they are only looking for someone who can satisfy their desire. But the truth is good marriage makes a good sex. Sexual intimacy becomes a grease to helps the wheels around to prevent dryness and squeaking. This intimacy increases joy of loving Non marital sex promises satisfaction and fulfillment before the act but individual regularly end up feeling guilty, empty, lonely, and insecure.

In a survey conducted by spotnepal.com among married couples 80% said that they would not have had premarital sex because of the many problems it causes after the marriage. Families have broken up and personal relationship have been destroyed because of non marital sexual actions.

Children having single parent encounters many difficulties. In a research it found that most victim of child molestation come from a single parent. They also believe that unstable or broken home can cause more damage to a child than the lack of additional parent. In order to make children grow into mature, responsible and upright person of the society he/she must have a stable family.

But what family really is? It is considered a family with a mother, father and children or surviving grandparent. But as Family code changes, today, children without parents may under the supervision of grandparent, oldest brother or sister, over twenty one years of age the actual custodian, a considerable family that built upon the combination of parental love and unified force of the spouses.

Many teenager girls becomes pregnant and afterward become a single parent. Meanwhile the government in Nepal dont have any program that supports single parents.

They should put up school dropout prevention program as in many developed european and Asian countries. The program should make a target to prevent the drop out of teenagers from their educational background.

The government should form a unit that establishes education sites for single parents and encourage them to join back their school. They should be given effective counselling and often job oppertunities that may help them to make a prestigious living in the society.

May 27, 2009 Posted by | New Generation | Leave a comment

The Importance Of Data Backup


It is best for office and home computers that use protected or confidential information like medical records and financial statements or any information you don’t want to lose.

Do you keep sensitive information on your computer that you would be upset if you lost it? If someone tells you that he is going to format your hard drive right now and you will lose all of the information on your computer, would you be ready? Computers are a useful part of our lives but we don’t always protect ourselves from their loss be it fire, theft or hardware failure.

You must have always come across the phrase “Data Backup” when you talk about data loss. It’s not that we don’t understand its importance completely but just that we pay little less attention to it than required.

Data backup can be useful only if done in a consistent manner. This is a precautionary measure that needs to be taken. The advantages of backup are evident in the event that the original computer hard disk crashes. Since the chances of that occurring are very high, when it occurs, the backup is very useful. Hence apart from what you need to do is to make sure that the backups that you have taken can be restored. Data backup without data recovery is not very useful. Hence you need to regularly check that recovery is possible too.

You must know the security requirements and concerns, and that your backup software ensures 100% data accuracy while restoring. You must also ensure that your backup sof tware prevents unauthorized access to the information, through a password or a variety of encryption algorithms. You must also ensure that there is less time between the two subsequent backups otherwise if there is longer period between backups, you may lose quite a lot of data.

services connect to your PC and backs up all your files and stores them in a server that you can access at any time, from anywhere in the world. You can also set the option of having an Online service monitor if you have new files such that it automatically stores new files when detected.

5 Tips For Backing Up Your Files

The key to backing up your files is to devise some type of system that works best for you and stick to it. You may choose to do it manually or use an automatic backup program. Whatever your case is, stick with it and do it frequently. Also, name and date your backups. If you have multiple versions, you will be able to tell which version is the most recent.

Hard Drives – Today external hard drives are so cheap that everyone should have one. They are not only perfect for storing all of those family photos and mp3’s, but the perfect solution for backing up critical files and in most cases ALL of your files. They are also a fast way to backup large files that may be too big for CDs or even DVDs.

CDs & DVDs – Backing up your files on a CD or DVD is also very important. Hard drives can go corrupt, get viruses, and can crash. Once your files are burned on a disc they are relatively safe. Blank discs are so cheap that it should be a part of everyones backup procedure. Discs are also a prefect solution for archiving files that you no longer need on your computer.

Offsite Backup – It is also extremely important to have at least some form of off-site backup. You could have a dozen backups at your home or office, but something could happen to that location such as a fire, theft, or a natural disaster. They will not do you any good if they are all lost. A simple fix is to keep a copy of your files at both your home and office. Or mail CDs or DVDs of your files to a friend or relative in another location. If something were to happen you would at least have that as a “fail safe”. Also Online Storage is another form of off-site backup.

Online Storage – There are plenty of online options such as xdrive (www.xdrive.com) and box (www.box.net) that range in price from free or start at around $5 a month. You may also use your current web-hosting as another form of backup. Most hosting plans offer at least 5 gigabytes of hosting space. You could create a folder on there called backup and upload all your files there.

Other Alternatives – Most web-based email accounts offer a large amount of storage space that could be used to backup files. Either upload your files there, if that is an option, or simply email yourself an attachment and you have another copy of it online.

May 27, 2009 Posted by | Education, IT, Technology | Leave a comment

Healthy Eating for Children


Getting children to eat can be a battle all on its own. Then add eating healthy and most parents throw their hands up in the air declaring it to be next to impossible.

Here you will learn tips for helping your children to eat and to eat healthy. It is not as impossible as you might think. The best way to develop healthy eating habits is to start when they are toddlers. The common sense rule of: start as you mean to go on. However, for those of us who realize too late the impact of junk food and unhealthy eating has had on our children, read on.

Two requirements For Healthy Eating

The number one requirement for your children to eat healthy is to ensure that there are healthy foods in the house. That means fridge, freezer and cupboards are stocked with healthy food choices. We won’t go so far as to say remove all of the junk food, but then again if you really want your children eating healthy removing the junk food means removing the option of eating unhealthy at least at home!

The second requirement for your children to eat healthy is for you to set the example. Our children today no longer tolerate the rule of do as I say, not as I do. That style of parenting went out a long time ago. If you continue to try this style of parenting don’t be surprised when your children follow your example.

7 Tips For Healthy Eating

Tip #1

Involve your children in meal planning. This work especially well for picky eaters. Giving your chi ldren choice often eliminates mealtime struggles. This does not mean that your children determine what the household will eat for every meal. Rather it means that they are a contributing member of the family and that their opinions are important. This sends a very strong message to children. Allow your child to choose one dinner per week for the family.

Tip #2

Tip #6

 

In your fridge keep a ready to eat fruit tray. Peal a couple of oranges and break into slices, grapes red and green, pineapple wedges and kiwi. Make the tray up with fruits that will be eaten and will not turn brown once cut up. They key for many kids is adding a fruit dip which is very easy to make. Purchase a container of cool whip lite and let it defrost. Add a package of your favourite crystal lite (single serving). My children love their dip made with the strawberry, orange banana crystal lite. Mix and serve. You will watch the fruit disappear!

Tip #7

Mix in veggies where they can’t see them.

If you are worried that your children are not getting enough vitamins and minerals naturally through their diet make sure to consult your family doctor. They may recommend taking a multi-vitamin supplement. You can also use vitamin supplements called greens in your cooking, follow directions and add to your cooking. Always consult a doctor before having your children take a multi-vitamin or cooking with vitamin and mineral supplements. This is not meant to be medical advice.

Involve your children in meal preparation. Children are much more likely to eat something that they have prepared. Being involved in meal preparation can be as simple as gathering items needed from the fridge and cupboards. They can measure ingredients, peel vegetables, grate cheese, pour sauces or preheat the oven.

Tip #3

Use child friendly recipes. Child friendly recipes usually have no more than three to five steps and involve common foods found in most households. There are many websites that dedicate a recipe section to child friendly recipes. Simply do a web search on child or kid friendly healthy recipes and your choices are endless. Chatelaine’s website you can actually search for healthy kid friendly recipes by entering the information into their drop box.

Tip #4

On your dinning room or kitchen table keep a basket with ready to eat fruit. Oranges, Banana’s and washed apples. You would be surprised how often foods even healthy ones are eaten when you walk past them and don’t have to go looking.

Tip #5

In your fridge keep a ready to eat (washed and cut up) try of: baby carrots, celery sticks and cauliflower and broccoli florets with dip. Keep your dip healthy by making your own. Better yet let your children make the dip. All you need to purchase is a container of lite sour cream and add one pouch of onion soup mix, stir together and place in the fridge covered with your veggies. For a quick dip try using your favourite salad dressings ranch or cucumber salad dressing are my families favourite for dipping veggies. You can always put this on the table with dinner. Many children who do not like cooked veggies love them raw!

May 27, 2009 Posted by | Health | Leave a comment

Using Digital Video Camera


There are many things that you all should know about getting the most out of your digital video camera. Many people jump into using their digital video cameras before ever learning about some of these helpful little tips, that can really make a big difference. It is time to stop making so many mistakes when using your digital video camera and start learning how to record and photograph just like a professional, or at least you will think of yourself as a professional when you start figuring more out on your digital video camera. It is important that you pay attention to some of these little tips because doing these things can definitely make a huge difference as to just how good you get at using your digital video camera. Too many people are afraid of their new digital video cameras, thinking that somehow they might hit the wrong button and just totally mess it up completely and you do need to know that these things are quite durable and very hard to break, unless you just drop it or beat it with a hammer!

Do not think of a digital video camera as something complicated, think of it more as something you could really have a great deal of fun using. You might even end up surprising and impressing yourself, who knows! The key to a good digital video camera moment, is to always remember to think about your lighting, hold your hands steady or use a tripod, utilize those amazing features that are available and do not over think what it is you are trying to do with your digit al video camera. It is

supposed to be enjoyable for you to play around with your digital video camera, not stressful, so do not make it out to be a job or something, relax, you will do fine. There will be so many opportunities for you to capture amazing and even funny moments with your digital video camera, and those opportunities that you took advantage of will turn out to be some very wonderful memories that you can enjoy for years to come.

Remember, if you are planning on uploading your digital video cameras recordings or photographs, onto your own home personal computer system, there are different types of software that you will need to think about purchasing beforehand. Without the type of software programs that you need, editing your photographs or video recordings might not be possible. If you can take a minute to determine which type of software you need in order to accomplish this kind of task, do so ahead of time so that once you are ready to upload all of it onto your computer, everything that you need will be right there prepared and available for use. It is a great deal of fun using a digital video camera and being able to show off all of your images to family and friends is also a lot of fun, for everyone.

May 27, 2009 Posted by | Entertainment | Leave a comment

Your First Love


First time intercourse should not be based upon a hasty decision, but rather a chaste one. Losing your virginity is very important and is certainly a moment that is remembered forever. If you feel it is time, let your partner know. With this knowledge, he/she should not only be respectful of your choice, but also very willing to make your experience unforgettable.

For women, first time intercourse may be painful. The discomfort may come from dryness of the vaginal walls or from the breaking of the hymen. The hymen, a thin protective layer of skin, may already have been broken due to gymnastics or horseback riding. Nevertheless, when it breaks it is known as, “popping the cherry.” At this point, the hymen will cause some blood to appear.

The dryness may come from a lack of her ability to enjoy the ride. If the woman is too concerned about someone seeing her naked, she will find it hard to relax and let her womanly juices flow. Those juices are a natural lubricant that will invite his penis over for dinner and welcome him to stay a while. If he is hurting you by going too far in or too fast, let him know. This is a moment that should be savored and not rushed.

When a man has sex for the first time, he may be afraid of premature ejaculation, or feel as though his manhood is insignificant. It is imperative for the man to show confidence and believe in his ability to make the ladies crazy. His female companion can help him with his confidence problems, by letting him know that he really turns her on.

At times, anxiety might get the best of you, thus it is vital to try and relax. Let your partner know that you are scared, because they can clearly calm you down. Put on relaxing music and light some candles; do whatever is necessary to help put you at ease.

There comes a time in every man’s life when he is ready for sex. This clich’ phrase is great, but it doesn’t include the other half of the equation; your partner. The most essential part to succeed in making love for the first time is communication. Let each other know where you stand. By doing so, your experience will be much more special.

Unfortunately in today’s society, the word “virginity” carries a negative connotation. People are beginning to have sex at younger ages and are diluting their morality. High school students poke fun at those who value their decision to wait. Kids can be cruel at times, and social pressures force a lot of young adults to rush. Much like holding hands, oral sex is becoming a standard in dating. The act of rounding third base has never been less controversial, and thus develops into a “gateway” for sex. For this reason, don’t let outside pressure influence your decision.

Before you choose to lose your virginity, ask yourself, ‘Are you ready?’ How many times have you left the mall with an impulse purchase in your hand? You should never rush into sex. Make sure the heat of the moment doesn’t overwhelm your decision making skills. If this does happen, take a deep breath and then come to a decision. Sex isn’t like a pair of heels that can be returned with a receipt.

While sex is always a new experience, it shouldn’t be a scary rollercoaster ride. Rather, it should be a blissful swim at the lake. Be prepared and have the condoms ready to go. No condom no sex. Donn’t rush into intercourse, this should not be a Aslam, bam, thank you mam,and occasion. Take your time and get to know each other’s body and points of pleasure. Tell each other what feels good and what does not. In time, you will have more fun than you could have ever imagined.

 

May 27, 2009 Posted by | Love, Relationship | Leave a comment

Your First Love


 

First time intercourse should not be based upon a hasty decision, but rather a chaste one. Losing your virginity is very important and is certainly a moment that is remembered forever. If you feel it is time, let your partner know. With this knowledge, he/she should not only be respectful of your choice, but also very willing to make your experience unforgettable.

For women, first time intercourse may be painful. The discomfort may come from dryness of the vaginal walls or from the breaking of the hymen. The hymen, a thin protective layer of skin, may already have been broken due to gymnastics or horseback riding. Nevertheless, when it breaks it is known as, “popping the cherry.” At this point, the hymen will cause some blood to appear.

The dryness may come from a lack of her ability to enjoy the ride. If the woman is too concerned about someone seeing her naked, she will find it hard to relax and let her womanly juices flow. Those juices are a natural lubricant that will invite his penis over for dinner and welcome him to stay a while. If he is hurting you by going too far in or too fast, let him know. This is a moment that should be savored and not rushed.

When a man has sex for the first time, he may be afraid of premature ejaculation, or feel as though his manhood is insignificant. It is imperative for the man to show confidence and believe in his ability to make the ladies crazy. His female companion can help him with his confidence problems, by letting him know that he really turns her on.

At times, anxiety might get the best of you, thus it is vital to try and relax. Let your partner know that you are scared, because they can clearly calm you down. Put on relaxing music and light some candles; do whatever is necessary to help put you at ease.

There comes a time in every man’s life when he is ready for sex. This clich’ phrase is great, but it doesn’t include the other half of the equation; your partner. The most essential part to succeed in making love for the first time is communication. Let each other know where you stand. By doing so, your experience will be much more special.

Unfortunately in today’s society, the word “virginity” carries a negative connotation. People are beginning to have sex at younger ages and are diluting their morality. High school students poke fun at those who value their decision to wait. Kids can be cruel at times, and social pressures force a lot of young adults to rush. Much like holding hands, oral sex is becoming a standard in dating. The act of rounding third base has never been less controversial, and thus develops into a “gateway” for sex. For this reason, don’t let outside pressure influence your decision.

Before you choose to lose your virginity, ask yourself, ‘Are you ready?’ How many times have you left the mall with an impulse purchase in your hand? You should never rush into sex. Make sure the heat of the moment doesn’t overwhelm your decision making skills. If this does happen, take a deep breath and then come to a decision. Sex isn’t like a pair of heels that can be returned with a receipt.

While sex is always a new experience, it shouldn’t be a scary rollercoaster ride. Rather, it should be a blissful swim at the lake. Be prepared and have the condoms ready to go. No condom no sex. Donn’t rush into intercourse, this should not be a Aslam, bam, thank you mam,and occasion. Take your time and get to know each other’s body and points of pleasure. Tell each other what feels good and what does not. In time, you will have more fun than you could have ever imagined.

 

May 27, 2009 Posted by | Love, Relationship | Leave a comment